2.8.07

Just when you thought you had it all, everything falls apart. Another dream wasted on you. Everything seems unsure. Nothing is forever. Nothing lasts forever. Everything is temporary. People come, people go, as and when they like. What about the ones who have been left? Left behind for being too slow, left behind for not conforming, left behind for reasons I can't fathom. Fate, destiny, life and death. Everything happens for a reason. But sometimes I just can't find them. The reasons why these things happen. And why in the end I'm always the one getting hurt.

I was looking at photos of my cats... And I realise just how much I miss the both of them. I still remember... I went home early everyday even though I had crazy things to do in school just to see their faces back at home. Now I know why people have children. I never cared if I didn't have anybody to love me back then...


I love getting "my hopes smashed". Macam fetish gitu. Macam gian. Everyday I will put high hopes on something and I can bet a thousand bucks that it'd get "smashed" on the very day. Macam gini I can be a millionaire by... Uhm... *counts fingers* Soon enough.

Sometimes when I get so tired of crying, I'd just lie down and laugh...

For you I was a flame
Love is a losing game
Five story fire as you came
Love is a losing game

Why do I wish I never played
Oh what a mess we made
And now the final frame
Love is a losing game

Played out by the band
Love is a losing hand
More than I could stand
Love is a losing hand

Self professed... profound
Till the chips were down
...know you’re a gambling man
Love is a losing hand

Though I’m rather blind
Love is a fate resigned
Memories mar my mind
Love is a fate resigned

Over futile odds
And laughed at by the gods
And now the final frame
Love is a losing game

Amy Winehouse is love... All her songs macam pose very sexual implications and this is one of her few songs that hasn't got any swear words or lines like "got your dick wet..." Haha! She's so woozy all the time. Drunk 24/7... Need to find Frank but that was released in 2003... They prolly won't have it now... So now I've just gotta find Sean Ghazi and Cafe Del Mar.

School's such a drag. Mr Chua finds every opportunity to catch me doing something wrong. Skirt too short. No going to toilet during lectures. No earrings. Pfft.

Life's a mess. And I can't seem to find the time to clean it up.

10:57 PM